bottomless potion of kulle-aid [hibiscus limeade spritzer]

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A few weeks ago, Waterfiend, suggested that I make something special for the upcoming release of Reaper of Souls. That suggestion was to create a version of the delicious RoS consumable Bottomless Potion of Kulle-Aid.

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OH YEAH. 

I have been in many scenarios where being able to smash my way through walls would have been very, very helpful.

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WOW, THIS SEEMS FAIR. ಠ_ಠ

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Unfortunately, this real-life version of Kulle-Aid won’t allow you to run through walls, BUT, it will provide you the refreshment you need to fight through Act V!

UNIT COMPOSITION

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  1. 2 teaspoons of honey
  2. 2 hibiscus tea bags
  3. juice from 3 limes
  4. ~2 cups of club soda

BUILD ORDER

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  1. Brew your hibiscus tea in about 6oz of water.
  2. Add in your honey and stir until combined.
  3. Add ice cubes to your brewed tea. Add in your lime juice.
  4. Pour about 1/2 cup of your hibiscus tea and lime juice mixture into a glass. Top off your glass with equal parts club soda.
  5. Enjoy!

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GG WP!

If you’re looking for a more adult version of this drink (aka, BOOZE!), I recommend adding a shot or two of shochu.

Now, if you want to up your cooking game and create a devilish spread for your RoS launch party, here are my Diablo-themed recipes:

Appetizers/Starters

Entrees

Desserts

Hope you have a happy Reapers of Souls launch day!

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treasure goblin bags [curried turkey stuffed wontons]

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The elusive Treasure Goblin and his big ol’ bag of presents is a very welcomed sight to the adventuring Nephalem. However, this is not ideal when he scampers off into a group of angry demons. Whhyyy I just wanted loot!

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Wait! Come back! 

When you eventually catch up to the little bugger and mug him of all his goods, you might be lucky enough to get a Legendary! WORTH IT.

Recently, I came across the all-mighty PUZZLE RING. It was a minor upgrade from my old ring, but more importantly, it gave me a faithful Treasure Goblin side kick. I’ve affectionately named him Gibbles, because reasons.

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BEST FRIENDS WITH THE BIG SCARY PUPPY.

With the Puzzle Ring equipped, your Treasure Goblin companion will eagerly pick up common items. When he picks up 13 commons, he’ll drop a rare or legendary item.

This has caused me to be come fairly obsessive when it’s comes to feeding my Treasure Goblin. I have died many times desperately trying to rush through mobs in order to get to an Armor Rack just so I could get another common item. I have definitely gotten many more legendaries farming normally than I have trying to feed my Treasure Goblin…. Maybe I should re-evaluate this strategy. Hmm…

Farming for legendaries does make me quite hungry, and you definitely can’t go hunting loot on an empty stomach. So, I’ve devised a GLORIOUS appetizer that is perfect for your next legendary adventure: Treasure Goblin Bags! These bags are stuffed with the nutrients you need to keep slayin’ demons.

Since my Treasure Goblin buddy, Gibbles, only exists in-game, I’ve enlisted the help of Lewt the Papercraft Treasure Goblin to be my trusty sous chef for the day.

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Let’s get cooking!

UNIT COMPOSITION

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  1. salt
  2. pepper
  3. 1/4 cup of chives, chopped
  4. 2 tablespoons of curry powder
  5. 1/2 lb of ground turkey*
  6. 1 cup of carrot/broccoli slaw, minced (reserve a few pieces for decoration)
  7. ~20 wonton sheets

*You can substitute tofu for the turkey to make this vegetarian friendly!

BUILD ORDER

Prep time is roughly 25 minutes. Cook time is about ~12 minutes. This will make 4 servings.

OPENING

  1. In a bowl, combine your salt, pepper, curry powder, chives, and chopped broccoli/carrot slaw with your ground turkey.blog_treasuregoblin_cooking1
  2. Stir until thoroughly combined.

MID GAME

  1. Take one wonton wrapper and place about a tablespoon of filling in the center of the wrapper.
  2. Dip your finger in water and moisten two edges of the wrapper.
  3. Fold the corners to create a triangle.
  4. Take the two bottom corners of the triangle and fold them to the center.
    Place two sticks of carrot or broccoli from your slaw between the gaps. Crimp the edges at the top to form a small satchel shape.blog_treasuregoblin_cooking2

LATE GAME

  1. Preheat your oven to 400° F (~204° C).
  2. Place your treasure goblin bags on a baking tray and bake for about 12 minutes.
  3. Remove from oven and let cool for about 3 minutes.
  4. Eat!

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Ta-da! GG WP. Now you’ll have these delicious appetizers full of legendary deliciousness.

Make sure you eat these quickly because you’ll never know when a Treasure Goblin might run off with them!

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Hey, whats in the bag? Oh, more bags.

parsnips of reflection [parsnip and turmeric soup]

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Rejoice, Nephalem, because Patch 2.0.1 is here! Huzzah!

There were many, many, many things that were added and changed in Patch 2.0.1. One of the shinier changes was the addition of a new brand of object to the map — the Pool of Reflection.

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The Pool of Reflection will give you an added bonus pool of EXP that will last until you DIE! So try not to die, or all that glorious additional EXP goes to waste. Noooo.

I have died several times while holding bonus EXP, and each time was much more painful than the last. I should probably stop standing in front of Demon Forges. Hmmm.

Every time I approach a Pool of Reflection, I always wonder what the pool would taste like when consumed. Would it be earthy? Would it be garlicy? When your hero drinks it, do they ever ponder what wine would pair best with it?

Well, I think I’ve figured out what the Pool of Reflection could taste like… Parsnips and turmeric!

This healthy vegetarian dish will keep you alert for your many, many Diablo adventures! You can make this dish vegan too!

UNIT COMPOSITION

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  1. salt
  2. pepper
  3. 1 tablespoon of olive oil
  4. 1 tablespoon of thyme
  5. 1 1/2 tablespoons of turmeric
  6. 3-4 whole cloves of garlic
  7. 1 1/2 cups of butternut squash, cubed
  8. 1/2 lb of parsnips, peeled and cut into 1/2 inch pieces
  9. 2 1/2 cups of vegetable broth

BUILD ORDER

Prep time will take about 20 minutes. Cook time is roughly 1 hour. This will make 6-8 servings.

OPENING

  1. Set your oven to 400° (~204° C)
  2. Place your parsnips, garlic, and butternut squash in a baking dish (you can make a tiny dish out of tin foil like I did).
  3. Season your vegetables with salt, pepper, and thyme.
  4. Drizzle olive oil over the vegetables.
  5. Roast for 45 – 50 minutes in the oven, or until the vegetables have become soft.

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MID GAME

  1. Transfer your vegetables to a pot.
  2. Using a stand mixer, blend the vegetables until smooth. Slowly add in half of vegetable broth in order to make blending easier.blog_parsnipsofreflection_cooking2

LATE GAME

  1. Once your vegetables have become a smooth paste, place the pot over medium heat.
  2. Add in your turmeric and stir to combine.
  3. Add in your remaining vegetable broth and stir until smooth. Add salt and pepper to taste.
  4. Eat!

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GG WP, Nephalem!

It’s been very cold recently, so this soup is perfect for warming you up during the chilly winter months. Cozy up, drink some soup, and gain some EXP!

See you in Sanctuary!

helix fossil bites [crab stuffed pastry puffs]

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About a week ago, someone decided to allow TwitchTV viewers to simultaneously enjoy a game of Pokemon Red together. Though it originally started as a social experiment, it quickly spiraled into something greater than that. The TwitchPlaysPokemon community became a culture with an immense following.

On the subreddit, players discuss strategies on how to get over 70,000 concurrent players to collectively do the same thing in order to complete the game. OK, getting 10 people to do something all together is difficult, but over 70,000 people? Now that’s insanity.

There’s currently two sides, Anarchy (Helix Fossil) and Democracy (Dome Fossil), who are in a constant struggle to maintain power. By the title of this recipe, you can probably tell which side I favor…

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ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ PRAISE THE GLORIOUS HELIX FOSSIL!! ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ

Now, before I get too carried away and start running circles around in an elevator, I need to start talking about this recipe.

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I wanted to create an appetizer that could represent the all-mighty Helix Fossil. Ahh praise the Helix Fossil! This bite-sized treat can be easily enjoyed while you mash your A and B keys in the TTP chat. 

So, let’s get started!

UNIT COMPOSITION

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  1. salt
  2. pepper
  3. 1 teaspoon of paprika
  4. 1 teaspoon of hot mustard
  5. 2 teaspoon of worcestershire
  6. 2 cloves of garlic, minced
  7. 1 tablespoon of chives, diced
  8. 3oz of lump crab meat, flaked with a fork
  9. 1/4 cup of cream cheese (brought to room temperature)
  10. 1/4 cup of spinach
  11. 1 sheet of puff pastry
  12. 1 egg

BUILD ORDER

Prep time for this is roughly 25 minutes. Cook time is roughly 15 minutes. This will make about 20 puffs.

OPENING

  1. In a bowl, combine your crab, cream cheese, salt, pepper, paprika, worcestershire, mustard, garlic, and chives. Mix until thoroughly combined.blog_helixfossil_cooking1
  2. Gently cook your spinach by either lightly boiling it until wilted, or microwaving it for about 30 seconds.
  3. Add your spinach to your crab mixture and combine thoroughly.

MID GAME

  1. Unfold your puff pastry and using a sharp knife or a pizza cutter, cut it vertically into 3 equal sections. Then, cut it into 4 equal sections horizontally. Cut each section in half. You should end up with 24 sections. Reserve 2 of the sections for the Helix Fossil design.
  2. Put about a spoonful of crab in on each pastry section. Gently fold the pastry over the crab and crimp the corners.
  3. Take an unused section and cut a 1/4inch strip of puff pastry. Roll the puff pastry into the shape of a helix. Use a knife to create the ridges on the shell. Place the helix decoration on top of the puff pastry.

LATE GAME

  1. Pre-heat your oven to 350° (~176° C).
  2. Place your pastries on a piece of parchment paper.
  3. Scramble your egg and add about a tablespoon of water to it. This will be your egg wash. Using your hands or a brush, gently dab some of the egg wash onto your pastries.
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  4. Place pastry puffs in the oven for 15 minutes or until golden brown. Remove and allow cool for about 5 minutes.
  5. Praise Helix Fossil.
  6. Eat!

GG WP!

Once you’ve praised the Helix Fossil enough, you should get something like these:

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Now, as you enjoy these delicious Helix Fossil bites, please don’t forget to take a moment to remember our fallen heroes.  CURSE YOU, DOME FOSSIL AND YOUR DOMEOCRACY!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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Hooray, it’s Valentine’s Day!

To celebrate, Bad Respawn hand crafted these incredible Hearthstone-themed Valentine’s Day e-cards:

murloc

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illidan

valeera

druid

Of course, I tried to make some myself…

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OK, so I definitely do not have a future in e-card writing or making… BUT, that’s OK because Valentine’s Day is also about FOOD and food is definitely my forte!

Need some ideas for a sweet treat for your sweet heart? Well, you’ve come to the right place!

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Need a treat for the Hearthstone-addict in your life? Why not make them a fresh batch of Hearthscones?

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What about for your favorite Nephalem? Try out these Diablo III-themed heart of sin cakes
Now, I know what you’re thinking… What if my sweetheart is a StarCraft player? Don’t worry — I got you!

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For the Protoss out there, try out this force field sticky rice.

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For the Zerg in your life, try out drunken infestors! Or, if they’re a big fan of breakfast:

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Try out infestation pit toast!

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Looking for something a bit more toasty for your Terran? How about hellion crème brûlée?

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Or give them a chocolatey treat with terranmisu!

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If your sweetheart is more of a LoL player, why not trap their heart with caitlyn’s yordel snap trap cupcakes?

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Or, you can just make them delicious chocolate pancakes. Aww yeah! And if you want to go a bit colder…

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Try out this boozy brownie checkerboard ice cream cake!

Have a happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! May your day be full of sweet sweet treats.